TECHNO BLUES

TECHNO BLUES
11/25/2019 1:00:00 AM by: LINDA WOOD RONDEAU

I surrendered many years ago.

But I still don’t have to like the technological age.

What is a techno klutz like me supposed to do to survive?

I asked Google assist. It’s answer, albeit in a polite voice, “My apologies. I don’t know how to help with that.”

If I don’t word my questions precisely, I confuse a robot.

And it’s hard to argue with a robot.

At least Google is good at finding my phone for me.

Hubs and I have gone the way of many. We got rid of our landline and now use only our cell phones. I must admit, texting is better than emailing at times. Though … bad eyes and fat fingers make my texts look like a foreign language.

I do keep my phone powered on all the time while at home. And I’ve set up the recommended notifications. But, unfortunately, remembering to bring the phone with me from room to room is a challenge. I warn folks that it’s better to email me if they want a fast answer since I’m on my computer most of the day.

I wonder if these new devices are truly objects for convenience. Not with an addled brain that can’t remember my code for the house alarm.

Or my brother’s.

Once, when I babysat their cats while they were away. I tripped their house alarm. After about five minutes, I figured out something was wrong and turned off the device with the remote. The alarm company called, as I expected, but the password was in the car. “Can you call me back in two minutes? I’m the cat sitter and I have to go find the password.” Talk about sounding suspicious.

They called back, I gave them the password, and they were content.

Or so I thought.

Apparently, my brother’s sophisticated alarm system notifies two people. And while I was on the phone talking to one person, another person was calling my brother; and the two of them never communicated with one another.

An hour or so later, there was an urgent email from my brother.

Where are you? The alarm went off and I couldn’t get hold of you. I left two messages on your phone. I called the police.

Since I go hours without looking for my phone … it’s almost always in another room … I didn’t get the message on a timely basis.

In times like this, I want to go back to using a landline.

But, no one would call me on it. So why bother?

ABOUT LINDA WOOD RONDEAU

Multi-published and award-winning author, Linda Wood Rondeau is a veteran social worker whose books examine the complexities of human relationships. Previously residing in Northern New York, the author now resides in Hagerstown, Maryland with her best friend in life, her spouse of over forty years. Though the author primarily writes fiction, her book, I Prayed for Patience/God Gave Me Children is a critically acclaimed adventure in parenting. Watch for her next nonfiction book, Who Put the Vinegar in the Salt/Called to a Higher Standard to be released later in 2020. A recent fiction work, Hosea’s Heart, explores the complexities of the mandate to forgive as God has forgiven us. Watch for her next fiction work,econd Helpings, to be released in Spring, 2020. Her blog, Snark and Sensibility, hosts writers of variousgenres. In addition, the author manages a Facebook page, Having the Prime of My Life, a positive look at aging issues. Readers may visit her web site at www.lindarondeau.com. Contact the author on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram.

Linda’s Christmas Books buy Links: A Christmas Prayer (print), A Christmas Prayer (ebook) I t Really IS a Wonderful Life, Miracle on Maple Street, and Snow on Bald Mountain